I jotted the idea for this blog post down months ago, long before we all started social distancing. It was originally going to focus on how I enjoyed working from home and was perfectly content having my in-person interactions be limited to friends and family. That equanimity took a hit when I relocated months after having my son and found myself in an unfamiliar city without the option to pop out to familiar locations with friends I’d known for years. Making new connections while juggling a new baby, running a business, and without co-workers to share both office space and experiences with is difficult. I had planned to discuss how I could both love all the benefits of being a company of one that works 100% remotely, and occasionally feel lonely and disconnected.
Then, coronavirus hit. If we’ve found out anything from the mass move to work from home options, it’s that it doesn’t work for everyone. Many people struggle with home/work life separation, lack of structure and routine, and the dearth of in-person interaction with coworkers and clients. Those issues are complicated by the current environment, which is ripe with anxiety, and throws children unmoored from daycare or school into the mix. I can personally attest that attempting to do serious work that needs mental focus and simultaneously keeping a toddler in the throes of separation anxiety alive is virtually impossible.
Thankfully, because I’ve been self-employed and working from home for four years now, my life hasn’t been as disrupted as many of my compatriots. My family provided, in-home daycare option (aka, my mom) which I moved to central Virginia for, is going strong. I’m still bringing in income, although it’s hard to predict what the landscape will be for landing new clients this year and into 2021.
But even with that sense of stability, my anxiety is sky-high: When will it to be safe to be out and about again? What will I do if a family member gets sick? How would I explain to my child if I got sick and had to self-isolate away from him? What will be the economic impact to my business? Will my child miss out on vital social development?
On top of that, I now have massive guilt. Should I have been taking online classes and having virtual networking sessions every day since I launched my business? Do I now need to be camera-ready all the time for impromptu Zoom requests? Individuals and organizations have (rightfully) loaded up on their digital options and pivoted to virtual events to address the current reality, but wow! The influx of options can be overwhelming. Bless your overachieving hearts, but I still have to balance being a mom and running a business, and sometimes I just want to watch Netflix and have a snack by myself.
Whether you’re a work-from-home newbie, or like me, feel like you’re in an alternate universe version of your real life, be kind to yourself. Communicate with others in ways and at times that work for you. We can desperately want the world to feel safe to explore again, to be around people, and need time to be “off” and alone. One is the loneliest number…sometimes.