This election has been a very difficult time for me. I was ready and looking forward to electing the first woman president. As I told many people leading up to the election, “it’s our time. It’s past time.” I wore white for the suffragettes when I went to cast my vote for the first female candidate from a major party and I cried when I watched the video of people lining up to leave I Voted stickers on Susan B. Anthony’s grave. I cried on my way to my polling places as I thought about the women that fought for my right to do so and the history I truly believed we were making. My emotions since the election have ranged from shock and disbelief to devastation. I am well aware of sexism, not the least of which was in my personal experience, but I have never before felt so devalued in my own country. A country where my family has lived for multiple generations and hundreds of years.
As a woman:
- I am angry at a nation that refused to elect a qualified, experienced, intelligent, and competent woman in favor of a man who is none of the above. As a successful professional woman, it’s a personal attack on me and many women I know. We cried tears of happiness when we voted for her and we cried tears of disappointment and disillusionment when we heard the results. And yet again when we watched her gracious, professional, and presidential concession speech. We knew, although we had experienced less of it than our mothers’ generations, that sexism existed – that we would hit the glass ceiling, but we wanted to believe that it wasn’t true, that the United States really could be an even playing field, at least in 2016. This was a brutal reminder that we were wrong. At 33, I am already tired of having to be better, of having to play along with men’s beliefs of who I should be and how I should act. I can’t imagine how Hillary feels after a lifetime of this.
- I fear that Trump’s election will only increase the violence, abuse, degradation, and discrimination that women suffer in both subtle and overt ways in their daily life
- I fear that it will silence sexual assault and domestic abuse victims, who rightly think that they will either not be believed or that it will make no difference if they are because there are no consequences
- I fear that women will be even further discouraged from running from political office, because they have been reminded of what people are willing to accept in order to step away from a female leader
- I fear that I will not live to see a woman as president
- I fear that men will think this gives them a precedent to further control my body
As a freelancer:
- I fear that I will lose my health insurance, available to me through Obamacare and purchased on the Affordable Care Act exchange and be unable to obtain coverage because of my well-maintained, but still chronic, condition
- I fear that Trump’s election will so disrupt the economy that they are unwilling to hire freelance/contract employees
- I fear that Trump’s blatant refusal to pay people who have worked for him will result in clients that refuse to pay me, forcing me to file suit in civil court and potentially to lose my home due to a lack of regular financial flow
As a human being:
- I fear the actions of a country that elected a racist, sexist, demagogue
- I fear that people of color will feel even more disenfranchised, discriminated against, and at risk than they already did in a country with a complicated racial history
- I fear that the LGBTQ community will be attacked and the limited rights that they have gained will be rolled back
- I fear that Muslims will never know that many of us truly believe in freedom of religion and acceptance of those different from ourselves, and that many of them will die as refugees waiting for us to reach out a hand
- I fear that my father, a Trump supporter (bless his poor, misguided heart), and 20 million others will lose their subsidized health insurance
- I fear that we may go to war, possibly nuclear war, on the strength of nothing else than a President who is easily annoyed and that he will not be dismayed by the deaths laid at his hands
- I fear that it will become dangerous to travel abroad as an American citizen
- I fear that we will do irreparable damage to the climate and make the Earth uninhabitable for future generations
- I fear that damage to our economy will result in a recession and loss of jobs with a safety net that will be further decimated
In general, I am afraid of the results of this election. I am afraid of the citizens who voted for this man and revealed their hatreds and discrimination. I am afraid of what he might do and of who will stand up to stop him. I am afraid of a country that doesn’t believe in reaching out to help their community, because but for the grace of God, go I. I am afraid. And I hope, more than anything, that my fear is not justified. But do not tell me that I do not have the right to be afraid. My emotions are not up for negotiation.
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